90 Day Fiance‘s Andrei Castravet tells Elizabeth Potthast to shake down her dad to pay for their wedding on Happily Ever After. Plus, Tania cracks on Syngin for day-drinking while Colt gets lucky with Jess. Also, Angela has bad news about her one sad egg from the doctor. Let’s break down the good, bad, and cringey on Season 5, Episode 2 Caught In The Crossfire. You can watch Sunday nights on TLC.
Andrei Castravet Wants to Hit the Cash Cow While Elizabeth Potthast Does a Got Milk Promo on 90 Day Fiance
Elizabeth Potthast is still salty at hubby Andrei Castravet. Last time, Andrei hijacked Elizabeth’s dad’s birthday party to announce their massive Moldovan wedding was just weeks away. Even Elizabeth was surprised. Andrei expects them to drop everything and come to the wedding (or not). It turns out, Andrei Castravet only cares if Chuck Potthast’s wallet is there to foot the bill.
Even worse, on 90 Day Fiance: Happily Ever After, Andrei tells Elizabeth to go grub up the money from her daddy. So, Elizabeth Potthast hits up the pool with her sisters and sister-in-law for breastfeeding in the round. This party definitely got milk. But not even baby-booby bonding softens them. They attack Elizabeth Potthast over the Moldy wedding plans. They Googled Moldova and decided it’s a nightmare.
So, Elizabeth tells them Andrei’s homeland isn’t so bad. But they aren’t willing to leave their bougie bubble on 90 Day Fiance. The short version is – they won’t let Andrei terrorize them with his country. Later, Elizabeth Potthast works up some tears and asks daddy for the money. Of course, he’ll fork over the funds. All Andrei Castravet wants to know is how much. He wants $15-40k, but preferably none of her family.
— 90 Day Fiance Fan (@TLC90DayFiance) June 22, 2020
Syngin and Tania Fled The She-Shed – It’s Miller Time
On 90 Day Fiance, our favorite witch doctor Tania Maduro and her hubby (but not soulmate) Syngin Colchester, are back. Tania messed up her foot. No, it wasn’t when she put it in her mouth making cracks at her hubby. It was from a car wreck. Syngin isn’t a fan of Connecticut’s climate, but her jacked-up footsy messed up their plans to move. Now, they got an apartment so they can get out of mom’s she-shed.
Mother Tania is glad that she won’t have to lock up her Jack Daniels stash anymore. And 90 Day Fiance‘s Syngin is glad he can walk around in the buff all day. Her mom’s concerned that they’re both jobless. Tania can’t bartend in her boot. And one-legged witches aren’t in-demand right now. Syngin says he is feeling the pressure and says he’s on the hunt for a job.
The 90 Day Fiance: HEA couple pays a visit to Tania’s sister. Syngin says he’s got an interview for a bartending job. Tania’s quick to point out that Syngin’s a day drinker who gets volatile when he’s boozy. He admits to breaking a few chairs and having a brew for breakfast. Also, Syngin fears being “trapped in Connecticut.” Dude — too late. Run while her foot’s busted, and she can’t catch you!
— simp vicious (@justy70190771) June 15, 2020
Asuelu Homesick on 90 Day Fiance: Happily Ever After
Asuelu Pulaa is happy to find a little slice of Samoa in Utah. He met some other Samoan buddies from church, and now they play volleyball after work. During a water break, the 90 Day Fiance import chats up his homeboys about his struggles with the wife and kids. Kalani Faagata expects him to do chores around the house. He says you can take the man off the island, but you can’t take the island out of the man.
On 90 Day Fiance, he takes Kalani’s advice and plans a date night. After giving her roses and chocolates, he takes her to throw axes. She gripes, but then Kalani ends up having fun. So, he springs it on her that he’s homesick and wants to travel to visit his family. Kalani agrees but worries about cost. The family Pulaa expect cash and livestock as gifts. Kalani says maybe a pig. But cows ain’t cheap. (Nor water buffalo – ask David Toborowsky)
— geneva diane (@gendianem) June 22, 2020
Paul and Karine Say Goodbye to Brazil
The Paul Staehle and Karine Martins neverending story continues on 90 Day Fiance with their spinoff Unhappily Ever After because Karine’s mad again. Now that baby Pierre is with them, they pack for America. Paul hasn’t found work in Brazil, so he feels it’s best to return to Kentucky. Karine is okay with it, but a little nervous. She’ll miss her mom, and the two have a tearful and emotional goodbye.
Paul calls his mom to ask if they can crash with the ‘rents for a while. Mother Paul says it’s a no from her because he’d never leave (true dat Edna). On 90 Day Fiance, she says he needs to man up and get his life together. But, she offers to help with a hotel for a few days. Paul isn’t sure how Karine will feel about that. Maybe he should ring up Tania’s mom about that vacant she-shed until they can get on their feet.
Paul’s mom went from sending locks of her hair with him to telling him “no” on staying with them. He must be a nightmare. Cheers to her and having boundaries! #90dayfiance #90DayFianceHappilyEverAfter
— self ice-ice lating self ice-ice lating (@SnarkandMeh) June 22, 2020
Angela Deem Gets Some Not So Good News on 90 Day Fiance
Angela’s overwhelmed. She’s got a houseful of grandkids and an ailing mother. Not to mention, trying to figure out how to get her boy-toy fiance Michael Ilesanmi to the USA. But first up, it’s time for some self-care. Angela thinks she got her period after a two-year dry spell. But according to her lady doc, maybe it’s just her last egg hemorrhaging as it gives up the ghost.
Angela explains to the doc on 90 Day Fiance. The doc does in an internal ultrasound while Angela jokes it’s “bigger than Michael’s penis.” TMI Ang… Sadly, Angie’s lone egg and ovaries are MIA. And the doctor thinks the bleeding is a bad sign. Angela’s got no eggs, and her basket may be broken. At home, Angela asks her mom’s blessing to marry Michael in Nigeria. And mama gives the blessing in a very sweet scene.
— TK (@TyJa4ever) June 22, 2020
Coltee Fails To Impress Friends of Jess on Happily Ever After
90 Day Fiance’s cat and mom lover Colt Johnson grabs coffee after bedding replacement Brazilian Jess Caroline. He creepily tells the cameras they had sex. Ugh. Jess is moody despite getting the D from Colt. It’s bugging her that he’s not told his BFF, mother Debbie, about her. Colt explains hearing he’s involved with a Brazilian could trigger his mom. Jess blackmails him into a promise to tell mama Deb about her.
Then, she takes Colt on a mini-tour of Chicago, including a water taxi on 90 Day Fiance: Happily Ever After. Colt grills her on her past then says he’s jealous of other men she’s seen. And Jess points out that he’s got a past, too. They meet Jess’s circle of South Americans who circle Coltee like vultures. That goes over as well as a car ride between Larissa and Debbie. Jess rages about some other woman.
He wants to leave the uncomfortable outing to do more jiggy-jiggy on the 90 Day Fiance spinoff. Jessica thinks he’s boring like an old man but still wants his sex once more before he leaves Chicago. There’s just so much wrong with this – and it’s not over soon enough. But not before Jess brags about being the boss in the bed. We cannot unhear any of this…
— Chismosa (@cheeze_mos_ah) June 22, 2020
Larissa on the Pole on 90 Day Fiance: Happily Ever After
With ex-Coltee moving on in the windy city, Larissa Dos Santos Lima works on her “sax ah-peel.” She wants a stripper body, so she takes a pole class in cheeky Daisy Dukes. She complains about the lack of mens and ponders going lesbian. In between pole combos, she talks about being conservative as she was raised “Cath-o-licky.” Her friend asks how she feels about a blind date.
After hearing that the unseen dude likes a fancy life and drinks fine wines, Lari’s all in on 90 Day Fiance. She doesn’t care that he’s blind (lost in translation). But, she hopes he’s hot, handsome, skinny, and feline-free. So basically, an un-Coltee. Her friend agrees to set it up. So, we’ll wait to see if she goes bananas on this unsuspecting guy right away – or waits to meet his mother.
For now, 90 Day Fiance fans wait to see how much cash Andrei Castravet makes Elizabeth Potthast shake out of her dad. And whether the sisters Potthast (and in-law) get their cameo on a got-milk ad. Catch Happily Ever After Sundays at 8 PM on TLC.
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