TLC ’90 Day Fiance’ Recap: Anny Rejects Dirty Granny’s Payoff – Red Shoe Diaries

On this 90 Day Fiance Recap, Anny says no to dirty Granny’s offer to pay her way back to the Dominican Republic. And, Tania Maduro keeps trying to be cool while trying on a fugly black wedding dress. And, Mursel Mistanoglu gets a visa do-over (or next-level TLC frauding) and heads back to marry Anna Campisi.

Then, Sasha Larin and Emily McCue make it official. And Juliana Custodio and Michael Jessen say I do with the help of his ex-wife Sarah Jessen. Grab your pink shirt and a fresh mimosa and let’s break it down.

You can watch 90 Day Fiance on nights Sundays TLC.

90 Day Fiance Recap:  Robert Springs’ Wife Anny Doesn’t Need Triple X Granny’s Dirty Money Or Attitude

Our 90 Day Fiance recap reports poor Anny can’t catch a break. Robert Springs’ brother Kenny attacked her over drinks and Robert did nothing. So, he takes her to the bargain rack at Shoe Warehouse to say he’s sorry with red patent pumps. It works and Robert Springs actually seems genuine as he ties Anny’s shoe and says he loves her. It’s a step up from the thrift store experience and Anny seems happy. For now.

Robert Springs decides to give Anny another go-round with Bryson’s grandparents Ben and Stephanie Woodcock (yep that’s her real name). The first time didn’t go well as porno granny Stephanie (AKA Diamond Foxxx) grilled Anny on birth control. She thinks Anny’s in it for a green card and some loose change from Robert’s lumpy couch. But, they meet for lunch on 90 Day Fiance and Robert’s hopeful as Ben compliments Anny’s shirt.

Ben tries to dialogue with Anny on how hard it must be for her in America. She says she loves Bryson and Robert and she’s happy. But they don’t like that she’s so attached to them. So, sexy G-Ma whips a check book out and offers a cool $15k for Anny to go the F away. Anny’s pissed and rightly so. And tells her she doesn’t need her nasty money as she’s staying right here. Robert agrees they’re a-holes. Seriously.

90 Day Fiance observation – Diamond Fox’s shiny claws perfectly match for Anny’s wedding shoes.

With This Ex I Thee Wed – Michael Jessen & Juliana Custodio are Official

When we left off 90 Day Fiance last week, Juliana Custodio was in tears on her wedding day with no contact from her family. Meanwhile, the groom Michael and his ex-wife Sarah wait at the altar. Michael’s ex Sarah Jessen officiates today and their kids Max and Cece are there too. Finally, Juliana walks down in all her perfection. And Sarah seems as awed as Michael. Then. Sarah launches into a speech that’s mostly about how great she is. To be fair… she is pretty awesome.

On 90 Day Fiance it seems Sarah has forgotten she’s here to marry these two. Like open mic night, she rambles and gets crickets. But, she seems genuine as she awkwardly gushes over Juliana and how the kids are thrilled with their new step-mom. Maybe Sarah’s looking forward to free babysitting. Adorable Max Jessen, looking like a mini-mayor, gives a speech. As does Cece. Then Sarah declares them hitched.

Little Cece Jessen tells 90 Day Fiance producers that Juliana did her hair. And Max says his only prep was a shower. Then, Sarah rambles again cam-talking about how she no way feels like she’s the bitter housewife cast aside for a trophy wife (Who she also has a crush on?). Cameras leave her as Michael shoves cake into Juliana’s mouth.

Get the kid on the ballot – Mighty Max for Greenwich Mayor 2040

Angela Deem Considers Getting Married in Nigeria (Spoiler Alert – They Did It)

On 90 Day Fiance, Angela Deem isn’t too happy after dinner with Michael Ilesanmi’s family. First, she was hassled into buying them black-market appliances. Then, she’s told to cook and serve as the “junior wife”. And now Micheal’s uncle suggests she take her Georgia a*s back home and let Michael start fresh with a local who’s got fresh eggs and no botox. Angie is pissed. She’s getting “barm-barded”. And Michael’s silent.

Angela Deem asks if that’s what he wants. Of course, he says no. He wants to live in USA with his soulmate Donald Trump. Duh. Mike says he’s lonely but willing to wait. Then the Family Mykull tells her to skip the 90 Day Fiance process and get married there to speed up the process. Angie softens and says she’ll think about it. They’re hoping to register at Nigerian Best Buy to rack up a blender and mini-fridge on Angie’s dime.

Spoiler Alert: Angela Deem and Michael Ilesanmi got hitched – see the pics here. Mazel Tov.

Tania Maduro Says “No” To The Dress and Bad Juju on 90 Day Fiance

Syngin Colchester is still sad about Tania Maduro’s soulmate diss. He calls up his pal Tjaart (named for an IKEA nightstand) to hang out. Tjaart and Syngin knew each other from South Africa. Tjaart has been in the states (Philly specifically) for three years. The dudes bro out over beers. Syngin admits he’s struggling. He gave up family, friends and even animals to come here.

Then he got left in a shed and humiliated in front of online psychic AfroMystic. Syngin suggests he’s thinking of going back home on 90 Day Fiance. Tjaart tells producers Syngin has to ask himself a hard question. Is Tania worth it? Hmm. (No) Tjaart says he gets how hard it is to adjust to a new country. But, he’s happy now. Probably because he doesn’t live in a box with Tania and no toilet.

Meanwhile, Tania drags her entourage out shopping. And tries to prove how edgy she is with a red or black dress. Then, she tries on one that looks like a second-chance prom gown. They convince her to try a white dress. Then she tells them how she crushed her 90 Day Fiance with the soulmate remark. Most of them are Team Syngin. Her mom understands, though. Because her soul mate is Jack Daniels.

Jasmin Lahtinen Makes It Clear She’s Allergic to Work – Stoic Parents Nod

On 90 Day Fiance, the Blake Abelard and Jasmin Lahtinen storyline plays out like a stone-faced soap opera. This girl is a trip. Jasmin wants to know how much he drank last night. Then, as he talks about his friends, she looks like she burped up curdled probiotic yogurt. Blake admits he’s worried this won’t work out. With her visa flashing before her eyes, she says she’s sorry. And (gasp) even touches him.

Jasmin’s parents arrive for the wedding. They meet Blake’s mom. Jasmin’s mom is excited (really, can’t you tell?) to see where her daughter’s living on 90 Day Fiance. She calls it a big and dangerous city. Everyone says hello and before Jasmin’s nonfat soy chai tea arrives. Blake’s mama brings up work as her son’s eye twitches. Jasmin is deadpan about her plans to not work and focus on herself. WTAF?

On 90 Day Fiance the Finnish ice-cube says she won’t get a job because she isn’t work oriented. She might do the “soshal meedya” if she has a good makeup day. But no 9-to-5… she needs inner peace. Girl, if you were any more peaceful, you’d be comatose. Blake’s mommy asks what her parents think. They are equally as nonchalant. Next, we’ll see these two get hitched in an LA park.

Did you know? Blake’s got a first wife – we can 100% confirm she has a job.

Mursel Mistanoglu’s Visa “Miracle” – Back to the States on 90 Day Fiance

Anna Campisi sits clutching her phone waiting on a call from Mursel Mistanoglu. After the dramatic good-bye at Omaha International, Anna claims he went home to face his awful family. We’re left wondering if TLC pre-filmed this footage when he left as part of their scripted break up/non breakup. Now, he says his mom said he can wed Anna Campisi. Jury’s out on whether any of this is real or more frauding.

He claims he got his single entry K-1 reissued (which is oh-so-rare and improbable) and was able to re-enter the States. Getting a K-1 reissued is almost as hard as finding Angela an egg to tote. But somehow, Mursel pulls off a “miracle”. Now, they have two days to say I do. On 90 Day Fiance, Anna is thrilled. But she’s got to break it to her kids. Who weren’t really fans of Mursel. Middle son Gino takes it well.

He admits he likes Mursel and misses the Turkish beekeeper. Youngest Leo is all in too. As long as mom makes the wedding awesome and he isn’t bored. Teenager Joey wants absolutely none of it. He smirks and says he won’t be at the 90 Day Fiance wedding and doesn’t really care. Mursel packs up and heads out. Will he make it? Stay tuned for next week for more. Anna Campisi just got busted frauding on her IG live, so who know how much of this storyline is real…

Sasha Larin & Emily McCue Say I Do

On 90 Day Fiance, Sasha Larin drives like a maniac as Emily nags him to slow down. (Anyone else see the compilation videos of nutty Russian driving?) Ginormous baby David chills in the back seat with miserable aunt Betsy McCue. They arrive at a lovely Airbnb on the Oregon coast. The two will wed the next day on the beach. But Betsy wants Sasha to promise he’ll love her sister forever. And ever and ever. Sasha squints and says he will (until he can’t). And Betsy weirdly grabs his hand in a flirty way.

Later Betsy holds up an ugly floral dress. And makes some passive-aggressive comment on how since it’s not a nice wedding or anything. So, she’s going to wear this old thing she found lying around. Instead of wearing the green dress she already has on that looks a thousand times better and is the color Emily wanted her to wear. Emily can’t be bothered with Debbie Downer and asks for a mimosa.

On 90 Day Fiance, Betsy mixes mimosas and slips one to Sasha Larin who calls it a girly drink. The have a friendly banter about whether drinks have genders. Sasha strips down to little undies and boxes in the mirror. The wedding goes off just fine at the seashore. Now we wait. There will be a new episode in two weeks. Super Bowl Sunday knocked our favorite dumpster fire off the air. So gird your loins.

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