This 90 Day Fiance: Happily Ever After recap has it all. Pedro Jimeno heads home on a one way ticket. Larissa Dos Santos Lima barters for lip injections. Ashley Martson digs deeper into Tinder-gate. Paola Mayfield and Russ Mayfield continue to bore the crap out of everyone. Andrei Castravet manages to do worse at an interview than Nicole Nafziger did. And Nicole continues happily down the path of delusion with Azan Tefou. Let’s breakdown all the stupid that was Season 4 Episode 4 “A Break is Necessary”.
90 Day Fiance Recap: Larissa Gets an Allowance and Plumper Lips on ‘Happily Ever After’
On 90 Day Fiance: Happily Ever After, Larissa Dos Santos Lima and Colt Johnson go on a date night. They briefly hold hands. Although it was nothing like the dreamy-eyed hand holding that took place on his last date with mother-wife Debbie Johnson. Larissa trusts Colt only about 20 percent. She wastes no time getting down to her list of demands. First up: a $3,000 Chanel bag. Of course Colt finds the demand ridiculous. He longs for the simpler tastes of mother Debbie.
To put it in simpler terms for Coltee, she wants money, money, money. After a back and forth, she agrees to a paltry $200 a month allowance. While Colt’s wallet certainly isn’t bursting at the seams, his shirt is. It seems Larissa wants to look like a Hollywood star. So, her theory is that Colt should pay for lip injections. Or else no sex. A visit to Lips-R-Us reveals they are twice her allowance. So, Larissa barters more BJ’s for bigger lips. And Colt says “okay”. So, Larissa gets new lips and well we know the rest….
So i think im starting to learn the hustle of this show..find a sucka while on vacation, marry them, move in with family, stay unemployed, decide to start a business, cheat, get your green card and live happily ever after. #90DayFiance
— Adulting Retired & I aint going back! (@ChynaDollRedz) May 13, 2019
Elizabeth Potthast and Andrei Castravet Move Out But Not Up
On 90 Day Fiance: Happily Ever After, Elizabeth decides that she needs to move out of her father-subsidized housing. She has to keep Andrei’s ego happy after all. So, behind his back, she calls her dad to ask for a security deposit on the new place. That way they can move out of the rent free house. Not sure which is more ridiculous – that she asked in the first place or that her dad agreed. She says the moody Moldovan’s pride is hurt.
Next, Andrei waltzes into an interview in shorts. He’s indignant that his lack of skills doesn’t land him a full-time job. And even more so annoyed that he must work his way up. So, of course, he walks out the way he walked in: unemployed. Later he balks at shopping at the second-hand baby store. But he has a brilliant idea: he will be a handy man! All it takes is to put an ad in the paper. No used shoes for his baby. Elizabeth says he’s being stupid. That doesn’t even begin to describe it.
I’m sorry wha…you wanna move out of your dads free house but you want to ask him for money to move??? #90DayFianceHappilyEverAfter
— NinjaJewels (@JewelsLace21) May 20, 2019
Nicole Plays Dumb and Dumber On 90 Day Fiance: Happily Ever After
This episode of 90 Day Fiance: Happily Ever After finds an unemployed Nicole Nafziger counting days till the Grenada trip. Over a beer, she gloats to her friend Jessica – who seems suspiciously planted by TLC. It seems she really has no idea of who Nicole is and doesn’t care. Meanwhile, she asks about Azan Tefou’s fidelity issues.
Nicole smiles and babbles on about nothing. That it was nothing. That nothing happened. That she knows nothing. All she cares about now is that in a few short weeks she can molest Azan in public. Perhaps Grenada needs to send out a warning to citizens and tourists. PDA is on the way.
— Bella G ? (@Bel_Lavi) May 20, 2019
Pedro Buys A One Way Ticket Away From Chantel
On 90 Day Fiance: Happily Ever After an antsy Pedro Jimeno packs for his trip home to the Dominican Republic. Far away from the family Chantel and Shockee, their pet taser. Chantel Everett sulks. She asks when he’s coming back. Certainly Pedro tries hard to hide his excitement and tells her he doesn’t know. So, he tells her he needs time off. Time off from her monotone voice and crazy family. She calls him an a-hole.
The two head to the airport. Chantel apologizes and says she loves him. She won’t like him being gone so long. He tells her she will have the cat. He can’t get out of the car fast enough once they arrive at the airport. Once he gets to the DR, it’s all happy music, sunshine and wine. Along with his mom and sister, it’s open season on the family Chantel. Pedro’s mom thinks they act superior. We all know sister Nicole can’t stand his wife. Chantel admits to producers the marriage might be lost.
Chantel and Pedro are so strange, I am like really, if you can't ready body language you are totally blind… Girl, he is cheaper to keep him but this is not a marriage. #90DayFianceHappilyEverAfter
— Samantha the Saint (@sue2cute4u) May 20, 2019
Pao Tries To Mend Fences With Mayfield Fam on 90 Day Fiance: Happily Ever After
Russ Mayfield sits down with his family to discuss wife Pao’s concerns. She feels judged. We flash back to the cringeworthy scene where she shows up with her ta-tas out for breakfast. Russ’ dad just straight up says they married too quick. And they did question her motives. But, they are willing to make a fresh start. Russ’ mom Patty is thrilled to learn that he has a job offer back in Oklahoma. But he hasn’t told Pao the news yet. Probably because he’d like to live to see his son born.
Later on 90 Day Fiance: Happily Ever After, Pao pays mom Patty a visit. Pao plays the misunderstood Latina firecracker role as usual. She feels judged. She gripes about them not supporting her cuh-reeeerr. The one where she flopped around topless on a beach for some dude with a camera. Certainly, Patty says getting naked for a photo isn’t something she thought her family would do. Seriously, Patty probably wasn’t even all the way naked when Russ was conceived.
Ashley over here shading the weight of a teenager? Smh ? #90DayFianceHappilyEverAfter
— Ashley Michelle (@its_ashmichelle) May 20, 2019
AshleyMartson Rings Up “Skinz Side Chick” For Answers
On 90 Day Fiance: Happily Ever After, Jay Smith and Ashley Martson hit the gym. Even the sound of Jay breathing is annoying the sh*t out of her. She has zero tolerance for this man-child who’s now her husband thanks to one too many mojitos on vacation. Ashley has Jay in limbo. Or as he puts it: completely by the balls. She tells him she’s going to New York City for a girls trip. The randy Jamaican perks up: he’ll do a Miami trip! Ashley shoots that down ASAP. And puts him in time out.
In the Big Apple, Ashley and her squad pop champagne and hit the clubs. Ashley immediately begins jawing about Jay and Tinder-gate. She even called the girl in question. And reminds us that this girl is much larger than she is. And much younger. In fact it was her “Senior Week”. Yes, that’s right as in senior in HIGH SCHOOL. Ash can’t get over Jay betraying her for a chubby teen. So she decides to call her up for all the details.
On 90 Day Fiance: Happily Ever After, Ashley rings up the barely-legal Tinder pal. She even has a contact name in Ashley’s phone: “Skinz Side Chick”. Unfortunately for us, SSC doesn’t answer. Hey, it’s a school night and she might be studying for a test. Ashley leaves a bitchy message about being Jay’s wife. And asks for a return call. We are left hanging at this point. So, till next week!
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