’90 Day Fiance: Before the 90 Days’ Angela Ready to Rumble – Tell All Part 2 [Recap]

On 90 Day Fiance: Before The 90 Days Tell All Part 2 Angela Deem came to brawl. Rebecca Parrott ran interference after Angela went after Avery Mills and Tim Malcolm (although they were asking for it). Benjamin Taylor offered up words of peace. Jesse Meester is now a motivational speaker for blue hairs. Caesar Mack ain’t too proud to beg but gets shot down in the end by mystery-no-more Maria. Let’s finally tie up this marathon of loose ends of season 3 with this recap of the 90 Day Fiance: Before the 90 Days Tell All Part 2.

Darcey Silva Defends Herself on 90 Day Fiance: Before The 90 Days

Darcey Silva and Tom Brooks are still being grilled. Tom’s sister Emma Brooks throws shade at Darcey while larger than life on a big screen. Who needs Jesse Meester to return while you’ve got Emma calling her out on everything from her drinking to her jealousy? Darcey’s twin Stacey Silva joins the party on the 90 Day Fiance Tell All. We hear about Albania again and Emma’s still tossing accusations like a cockney Judge Judy while they ignore her.

On 90 Day Fiance: Before The 90 Days, Tom says he’s not sure if Darcey’s really there for him. And says they’ve already had an argument because Darcey got sloshed in the hotel lobby bar and cuddled with a rando. Darcey denies this but it’s obvious she just doesn’t remember. Stacey and Darcey do their typical tit for tat while wearing ball gowns and identical weaves. Darcey says she’s over the Jesse stuff and hasn’t reached out to him, but that he’s reached out to her. That’s proved false in a few hours…

Meanwhile, the other cast members sit around backstage. Producers bring Jesse in and he introduces himself and attempts to shake hands with everyone. Avery and baby Grinch Tim both refuse. Tim wants to know why he’s even there and still trashing Darcey on social media. To be fair, Jesse remains calm and doesn’t take the bait. He explains he’s there to talk about himself, not them. Sorry, since when are Avery and Tim executive producers on 90 Day Fiance: Before The 90 Days?

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Angela Deem Gets Granny Panties in A Bunch

On 90 Day Fiance: Before The 90 Days, Angela Deem walks in on everyone dissing Jesse. She starts yelling at Avery that it’s none of their business and to quit bullying the Dutchman. She tells Jesse to go on stage and tell his side of the story. Avery tries to chime in and Angela tells her to shut up because she’s got six grandkids. And that a Muslim shouldn’t be runnin’ her mouth to an elder. So, now she’s an elder?

Avery starts bawling and telling Jesse she suffered through an abusive relationship and that’s why she’s triggered by his presence. Jesse, who clearly has no idea who this person is asks her name and calls her sweetheart. Mom Teri Mills tries to console her. Meanwhile Angela Deem’s sucking down a cig and Face Timing with Michael outside the 90 Day Fiance set. Michael tells Angela to calm down and prays there are no cakes around.

On 90 Day Fiance: Before The 90 Days, everyone returns to the stage. Angela Deem is still b*tching about Tim and Avery bullying Jesse. Avery is still crying and Rebecca Parrott asks Angela Deem to back off. Rebecca and Angela face off and Rebecca asks if she’s really like this? Trashy? To which Angela replies that “all day long she’s trashy”. Teri Mills runs to the green room as producers shout. Teri confronts Angela who storms out telling Avery to grow the eff up. Tom whisks Angela Deem out for her tenth smoke break.

The Show Must Go On – 90 Day Fiance: Before The 90 Days Scrapes Three Hours Out of Nothing

Avery is still upset and talking about a past relationship with someone who acted like Jesse. Shaun asks Ben to explain about the offscreen antics. Ben says Angela came in like a wrecking ball. And offers up a bit of inspirational wisdom about the world being broken and loving more and hating less. Outside Tom and Angela suck on cigs and she rants about fightin’ for rights. Inside, Rebecca consoles Avery and sends her to pray on a mat on the floor.

On 90 Day Fiance: Before The 90 Days, the chaos spills out into the halls. Darcey and Avery cry and hug over their shared relationships with narcissistic a-holes. Rebecca calls Angela Deem trashy and Ben says she is disgusting. Darcey tells everyone that Jesse is here to blow smoke up his own ass. And she’s over it. Then stops to check his Instagram to see if he’s mentioned her in any cryptic way. On stage Shaun takes a minute to suck on a Tic Tac for energy. This Tell All for 90 Day Fiance: Before The 90 Days is painfully long and pointless…

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Jesse Meester: Motivational Speaker or Grand Delusion

On 90 Day Fiance: before The 90 Days, Jesse is quarantined like a rabid dog since his mere presence triggered the green room into chaos. Shaun brings him out solo. Shaun asks about the backstage showdown. He says that Tim and Avery got judgmental on him. And that Angela Deem defended him. He says since he and Darcey broke up he’s doing great and will soon have a psychology degree.

He boasts that he’s a life coach and has helped many. We see Jesse in action at a speaking event. At an assisted living facility. I s*it you not (pun intended). Jesse got the time slot just before lunch so 8 out of the 10 who got wheeled in to listen were awake. He even had lunch with the residents and took questions. Over baked tilapia with carrots and rice, a couple of the ladies asked if he came from IKEA.

On 90 Day Fiance: Before The 90 Days, we see a clip of Jesse out with friends and he’s talking about Darcey and how she’s obsessed with him. He tells Shaun he’s got proof of her calling him. And says he only called in the summer because she’d been calling all night. He says he’s “close” to having a girlfriend. And that he feels bad for Tom because the “troof” about Darcey will come out. Then he shows some receipts of Darcey blowing up his phone. Watch Tom – watch!!!

Angela Deem’s Totin’ 99 Things in Her Bra, But An Egg Ain’t One

Shaun brings Angela Deem and daughter Skyla to the 90 Day Fiance: Before The 90 Days  set with Michael still on-screen. Shaun is overcome by the smell of stale smoke and sweaty flip-flop, but she pushes through. Of course the clip of Angela smashing a cake in Michael’s face plays. Shaun asks if that was a bit of an over reaction. Skyla says “not for mama”. Just like when your mother asks you to fork over an egg to have her younger boyfriend’s baby so she can call it her own and raise it along with her six grandkids.

Then, Shaun asks if Michael’s allowed to have a social life. And hell no that boy ain’t allowed to have a social life. Angela says she doesn’t have one. Because you know 6 grandkids and all. Shaun asks if Michael will leave Angela Deem if she can’t cough up a kid. He says they will sort it out with God’s help. Good answer Michael, because any other answer and she’d be coming right through that screen with a Louisville slugger she had tucked in her bra on 90 Day Fiance: Before The 90 Days .

Red Flags, Alpha Males and P*ssy’s – The Tell All Drags on (and on and on)

On 90 Day Fiance: Before The 90 Days, there’s still another hour to go. Shaun Robinson hangs on like a spider clinging to a toilet bowl mid-flush. Akinyi Obala , who has the personality of a prison guard, continues to insult Ben, now with the help of her scary brother Fidel Obala. They remind him that he’s soft, broke and not an alpha male. He gets props from Fidel for cutting off Akinyi after one margarita. Ben says he’s going back to visit. Better cough up the rest of that bride price or else.

Next up in clips, we see Jeniffer Tarazona call Tim the R-rated version of wussy several times. Especially when he wouldn’t go on the swing over the cliff. Who would? Angela Deem’s bra straps hold more weight than that rope would. Tim puts to rest social media rumors that he is gay or that he was born a woman. Jeniffer is still planning a trip to America. Where she will call him her kitty pet name when he refuses to bungee jump off the Stratosphere in Las Vegas.

On 90 Day Fiance: Before The 90 Days, we see clips of Rebecca dropping many bombs on Zied. She said she told him about her relationship with a woman because she didn’t want him being homophobic in the US. She brings up her ex and the many red flags she ignored. Her friend and co-worker joins the couch. She’s worried Rebecca will be footing all the bills. Rebecca says she is a restaurant manager and a PI. So she can snag Zied a dishwasher job somewhere. Hey, it’s a start.

Caesar Pours His Heart Out -90 Day Fiance: Before The 90 Days Tell All Part 2

And now, the moment we’ve been waiting for. The light returns to Shaun’s eyes as the world gets to see Caesar Mack shredded by Maria and the rest of the cast. After clips of his many public humiliations this season, the cast goes in on him. He was scammed. Caesar needs to wake up. And deserves better. But Caesar’s not giving up yet. And things get even weirder when he brings up that he also brought a whip along with those candy undies.

On 90 Day Fiance: Before The 90 Days, Maria appears. This chick looks like Ukrainian Christina Applegate. Hard to believe she would be down for wearing a sweet tart thong while Caesar goes 50 Shades on her a*s. Oh no. She gets her money for nothing and her trips for free. Caesar immediately calls her baby girl. And Rebecca clearly threw up in her mouth. Strong stuff from someone who says she uses the pet name “sugar britches”.

The on this 90 Day Fiance franchise season ender, Maria makes it clear that she did “love” Caesar. But that he’s the real catfish in this deal. Exaggerating their relationship, how long it was, and how much money he shelled out. And making her look like a b*tch. Well you really don’t need help on that part Maria. Caesar pours his heart out. He still loves her and wants to work it out. Nah. She’ll pass. She wants him to move on. And that’s the end my friends.

There’s an all-new cast on Sunday for the new season of 90 Day Fiance. Well a mostly new cast because TLC brought Angela Deem’s Georgia a** back for more with Mykull.

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